You haven’t really been eating that well in the past month. Really, you’ve only ‘forced’ an average of 2 or 3 exercise sessions weekly. You’re feeling guilty that you aren’t disciplined. You just can’t “seem to get back on track”. Sound familiar? Actually it sounds like most of us at some point in time.
Now, this is exactly the moment that you must believe in yourself. No matter how many times you may have failed, no matter how many times you’ve thought you’d do better, only to blow it again, do this one thing: Commit yourself to believing that winning (in whatever area it is) is still possible for you. You can’t ever do anything to alter what’s already happened. But your attitude and belief in yourself can impact your success from here on in. Many people have experienced failure piled on top of failure, but they ultimately won because they insisted on believing that winning was still possible for them, and they wouldn’t quit trying to achieve a goal for themselves.
A lot of times we just have to let go of negative thoughts and feelings. As one writer said, “we have to develop a strong dose of ‘so what.’” For example: “They didn’t have my hotel room ready…”-so what? “Somebody was rude to me…”so what? “I really messed up by having that piece of dessert…” so what? Unless you develop a strong ability to say to yourself, “so what,” your mind will continue to imagine self-loathing. Do little irritations get you down? If so, work on a strong dose of “so what.” Don’t allow yourself to get bent out of shape by small events.
Learn to like yourself. Stop reminding yourself of your failures, and start encouraging yourself. The truth is, you’ll be your own best friend if you learn to accept yourself and encourage yourself on a regular basis.
All of this takes a lot of practice. For most of us, we will concentrate on things we perceive as failure. But they are only perceptions, not reality. We must become our own cheerleader. If we want to succeed in weight loss (or becoming fit) we must learn to believe (REALLY believe) that we can do it, no matter what has occurred in the past and no matter what events might make us stumble in the future.
Truthfully, nothing stands in our way except ourselves. We are what we believe. Words like “I can’t,” or, “it’s impossible” or, “I’ve tried so many times and failed;” only strengthen the risk of failure. We can achieve anything, but we must be persistent. Set small goals, and work on believing that you CAN and WILL achieve your goals. Each time you achieve a goal, your belief strengthens. Maybe it’s as simple as saying, “I will only have one small snack in the evening for the next week.” When you accomplish this, you are well on your way to having control over your eating. Maybe it’s committing to 3 walks a week no matter how ‘tired’ you feel. Once again, you will feel empowered when you find yourself doing this. Don’t pause, don’t question, don’t make excuse; just believe and do it.
Keep on trying, and don’t ever give up.
Dr. Doug